Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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