There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
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He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
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Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
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