i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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