Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize