I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Found your dick twin last night
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
