So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Randomize
