somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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