Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
