I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
My liver just broke up with me...
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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