You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
