need another drink. this is the easiest way
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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