Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Found your dick twin last night
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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