Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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