the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times