Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  He has that thing where they hang SUPER low

  (650): View more from California

  Ewww!! Elephantitis

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  (313): He has that thing where they hang SUPER low (650): Ewww!! Elephantitis http://tfl.nu/rmok
  Replies (7) Good night (789) Bad night (1327)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.

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  (405): He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk. http://tfl.nu/iths
  Replies (47) Good night (1022) Bad night (3842)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time

  (1-908): View more from New Jersey

  I'll google it

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  (908): You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time (1-908): I'll google it http://tfl.nu/bsan
  Replies (22) Good night (5150) Bad night (1787)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single

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  (609): you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single http://tfl.nu/hya7
  Replies (20) Good night (1149) Bad night (4905)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music

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  (206): And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music http://tfl.nu/tzqo
  Replies (7) Good night (2878) Bad night (1364)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor

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  (925): We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor http://tfl.nu/cj2b
  Replies (8) Good night (2449) Bad night (1391)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.

  (1-619): View more from California

  Very innocently.

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  (619): I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend. (1-619): Very innocently. http://tfl.nu/o8xf
  Replies (19) Good night (3095) Bad night (701)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.

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  (717): you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats. http://tfl.nu/2ggd
  Replies (6) Good night (1818) Bad night (779)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing

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  (316): You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing http://tfl.nu/1k7o
  Replies (13) Good night (2300) Bad night (643)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him

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  (254): He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him http://tfl.nu/fs9i
  Replies (9) Good night (1258) Bad night (758)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up

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  (248): I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up http://tfl.nu/z2m0
  Replies (2) Good night (605) Bad night (380)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.

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  (410): Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you. http://tfl.nu/34nw
  Replies (3) Good night (525) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.

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  (440): my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness. http://tfl.nu/lky4
  Replies (3) Good night (763) Bad night (321)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.

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  (937): I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it. http://tfl.nu/ozbd
  Replies (0) Good night (620) Bad night (271)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."

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  (615): Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy." http://tfl.nu/rhbz
  Replies (1) Good night (687) Bad night (545)

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