I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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