You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
