They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
