Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
