I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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