If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
He better not be in your backpack
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
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