you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
