my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
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