We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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