a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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