just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
