Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
