I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
