how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
