Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
