she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
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