I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
