My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Shame - the story of my life.
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