consequently i now know what mace tastes like
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
