I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Randomize
