Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize