That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize