hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
...so i touched it.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
