You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
she looked like the before picture.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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