JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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