even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
