end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
