batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
