Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
