the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
