that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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