she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
We left an ass print on the piano.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize