just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
