Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
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Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
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Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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