Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
