WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Randomize
