erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
